Proud of working late? You may be compulsive

by Carrie Ferguson
The Nashville Tennessean

Do you think about work all the time? Do you work long hours, far beyond the requirements of the job? Are you anxious when you're not at work?

If you answered yes, consider that you might be a workaholic, a person compulsively addicted to work.

How can that be, addicted to work? In truth, anything you can do, you can abuse - alcohol, food, exercise - and work addiction is just one more form of compulsivity that keeps us perpetually busy and keeps us from looking inside ourselves, counselors say.

"It is a compulsive pattern of behaviors with the underlying causes being anxiety and fear of things being out of control," says Janet Salyer, a licensed professional counselor and career coordinator for the YWCA. "Like other addictions, you are seeking a way of not having to look at or feel things or just to self-medicate to take care of pain, anxiety or feelings.

"Workaholics put the job before family, friends and their own health. And even if they're spending time with their families, their mind is on work."

Take note, there is a difference between hard work and compulsive work. Hard work enriches your life even if it includes some periods of long hours and extra work. A persistent pattern of compulsive work takes away from your life.

But we live in a society that rewards compulsive work behaviors and we get applauded for keeping long hours and taking on more and more responsibilities. Being called a workaholic is often not taken as an insult, like say, being accused of alcoholism.

"Our society in some ways reinforces and rewards workaholism. Sometimes it is subtle, but there is a lot of recognition given to people for being extremely busy. It is almost like equating someone's value with how busy they are," Salyer says.

A client of Salyer's said her co-workers would come in on Monday mornings and talk about how many hours they had put in during the weekend. The people who didn't come in during their time off were viewed as less interested in the good of the company.

"Some organizations reinforce overwork," she says.

Sometimes the walls come tumbling down, and the workaholic employee begins to get sick or see relationships crumble.

"The rest of your life gets far less of your time and attention, and when things are out of balance in relationships and leisure time, you become physically and emotionally depleted eventually," Salyer says.

Help for workaholism includes seeking the services of your company's Employee Assistance Program, which can include counseling; seeking counseling on your own; talking to your boss, if it is safe to do so; or joining a 12-step recovery program such as Workaholics Anonymous.

"Counseling is important because often people with compulsions will get one under control and pick up another," Salyer says. For example, maybe you aren't working as many hours, but now you're spending an awful lot of time at the gym.

The reason is that compulsivity, whatever form it takes, often is rooted in early life experiences and dysfunction. Identifying that often is the key to addressing the compulsive behaviors.

A National Mental Health Association brochure called Coping With Your Job says employees should be realistic about what they can change; be honest with their colleagues and boss; and be constructive about changes they'd like to make, instead of offering complaints.

"Slowing down and learning to say no and being assertive about boundaries takes practice," Salyer says. "Change can be difficult because you get the subtle message that people think you don't care, that you are not committed. It is a vicious dilemma."

Taking better care of your physical, emotional and spiritual health are steps in the right direction.

"Learn to relax and not neglect your private life," Salyer says.

The Seattle Times Company

Friday, February 25, 2000